Holy Stamps! Or, the Gospel illustrated with stamps.

Posted on July 18, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

In the Beginning

John 1:1-4
In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God.2 He was in the beginning with God; 3 all things were made through him, and without him was not anything made that was made. 4 In him was life, and the life was the light of men. 5 The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.

The Birth of Jesus

Luke 2:1-7
In those days a decree went out from Caesar Augustus that all the world should be enrolled. 2 This was the first enrollment, when Quirin′i-us was governor of Syria. 3 And all went to be enrolled, each to his own city. 4 And Joseph also went up from Galilee, from the city of Nazareth, to Judea, to the city of David, which is called Bethlehem, because he was of the house and lineage of David, 5 to be enrolled with Mary, his betrothed, who was with child. 6 And while they were there, the time came for her to be delivered. 7 And she gave birth to her first-born son and wrapped him in swaddling cloths, and laid him in a manger, because there was no place for them in the inn.

The Shepherds and the Angels

Luke 2:8-20
8 And in that region there were shepherds out in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night. 9 And an angel of the Lord appeared to them, and the glory of the Lord shone around them, and they were filled with fear. 10 And the angel said to them, “Be not afraid; for behold, I bring you good news of a great joy which will come to all the people; 11 for to you is born this day in the city of David a Savior, who is Christ the Lord. 12 And this will be a sign for you: you will find a babe wrapped in swaddling cloths and lying in a manger.” 13 And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God and saying,

14 “Glory to God in the highest,
and on earth peace among men with whom he is pleased!”

15 When the angels went away from them into heaven, the shepherds said to one another, “Let us go over to Bethlehem and see this thing that has happened, which the Lord has made known to us.” 16 And they went with haste, and found Mary and Joseph, and the babe lying in a manger. 17 And when they saw it they made known the saying which had been told them concerning this child; 18 and all who heard it wondered at what the shepherds told them. 19 But Mary kept all these things, pondering them in her heart. 20 And the shepherds returned, glorifying and praising God for all they had heard and seen, as it had been told them.

The Visit of the Magi

Matthew 2:1-12
Now when Jesus was born in Bethlehem of Judea in the days of Herod the king, behold, wise men from the East came to Jerusalem, saying, 2 “Where is he who has been born king of the Jews? For we have seen his star in the East, and have come to worship him.” 3 When Herod the king heard this, he was troubled, and all Jerusalem with him; 4 and assembling all the chief priests and scribes of the people, he inquired of them where the Christ was to be born. 5 They told him, “In Bethlehem of Judea; for so it is written by the prophet:

6 ‘And you, O Bethlehem, in the land of Judah,
are by no means least among the rulers of Judah;
for from you shall come a ruler
who will govern my people Israel.’”

7 Then Herod summoned the wise men secretly and ascertained from them what time the star appeared; 8 and he sent them to Bethlehem, saying, “Go and search diligently for the child, and when you have found him bring me word, that I too may come and worship him.” 9 When they had heard the king they went their way; and lo, the star which they had seen in the East went before them, till it came to rest over the place where the child was. 10 When they saw the star, they rejoiced exceedingly with great joy; 11 and going into the house they saw the child with Mary his mother, and they fell down and worshiped him. Then, opening their treasures, they offered him gifts, gold and frankincense and myrrh. 12 And being warned in a dream not to return to Herod, they departed to their own country by another way.

The flight to Egypt

Matthew 2:13-15
13 Now when they had departed, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to Joseph in a dream and said, “Rise, take the child and his mother, and flee to Egypt, and remain there till I tell you; for Herod is about to search for the child, to destroy him.” 14 And he rose and took the child and his mother by night, and departed to Egypt, 15 and remained there until the death of Herod. This was to fulfill what the Lord had spoken by the prophet, “Out of Egypt have I called my son.”

Many years pass. Jesus begins to teach. He tells everyone that God loves them and that they are forgiven, and they are to love and forgive everyone else. Then it comes time for the Passover, and for him to be sacrificed.

Jesus enters into Jerusalem upon a donkey

John 12:12-19
12 The next day a great crowd who had come to the feast heard that Jesus was coming to Jerusalem. 13 So they took branches of palm trees and went out to meet him, crying, “Hosanna! Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord, even the King of Israel!”14 And Jesus found a young ass and sat upon it; as it is written,

15 “Fear not, daughter of Zion;
behold, your king is coming,
sitting on an ass’s colt!”

16 His disciples did not understand this at first; but when Jesus was glorified, then they remembered that this had been written of him and had been done to him. 17 The crowd that had been with him when he called Laz′arus out of the tomb and raised him from the dead bore witness. 18 The reason why the crowd went to meet him was that they heard he had done this sign. 19 The Pharisees then said to one another, “You see that you can do nothing; look, the world has gone after him.”

Jesus dies and is raised from the dead.

John 12:27-36
27 “Now is my soul troubled. And what shall I say? ‘Father, save me from this hour’? No, for this purpose I have come to this hour. 28 Father, glorify thy name.” Then a voice came from heaven, “I have glorified it, and I will glorify it again.” 29 The crowd standing by heard it and said that it had thundered. Others said, “An angel has spoken to him.”30 Jesus answered, “This voice has come for your sake, not for mine. 31 Now is the judgment of this world, now shall the ruler of this world be cast out; 32 and I, when I am lifted up from the earth, will draw all men to myself.” 33 He said this to show by what death he was to die. 34 The crowd answered him, “We have heard from the law that the Christ remains for ever. How can you say that the Son of man must be lifted up? Who is this Son of man?” 35 Jesus said to them, “The light is with you for a little longer. Walk while you have the light, lest the darkness overtake you; he who walks in the darkness does not know where he goes. 36 While you have the light, believe in the light, that you may become sons of light.”

Lemon pepper basil fish

Posted on July 18, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

This works well with tilapia, because it has a mild flavor and is firm. One filet is two servings. One serving of protein is the size of a deck of cards.

Get a large non-stick pan and heat it to medium. Then add your oil, just enough to lightly coat the bottom. I use Newman’s extra virgin organic olive oil.

Then add a tilapia filet.

Sprinkle with lemon-pepper seasoning (Mrs. Dash brand has no salt and is very tasty) and basil. An option is to add some powdered ginger.

Let it cook for a few minutes, until the edges of the fish start to turn opaque. If the oil starts to bubble, turn the heat down a notch.

Carefully turn it over – you’ll want to use a spatula underneath and a fork on top. Otherwise, the fish will slide around and you’ll either not get it turned over or you’ll break the fish into two parts in the middle, or worse, you’ll splash hot oil.

Sprinkle more lemon-pepper and basil (and ginger) on the fish. Let it cook a few more minutes, until it all goes opaque and the fish flakes easily with a fork.

Let the fish cool and de-oil a bit on some paper towels on top of newspaper.

Serve on top of brown rice, with steamed vegetables.

Talents aren’t for us, they are for God.

Posted on July 17, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

In the parable of the talents, in Matthew 25:14-30, is about trusting in God and using the gifts that God has given you.

The “prosperity Gospel” preachers will tell you that this parable means that God wants you to make more money, but they have it wrong. Remember that “the love of money is the root of all evil”?

So what is it about?

The king (who represents God) gives money, to three people. It is understood that he is coming back. He gives different amounts to them “to each, according to their ability.”

Two of them are mindful of their gifts and use them to make more. One is afraid of the king and buries the money so he doesn’t lose it. When the king returns and asks for an accounting of his money, the first two are able to give the king back more than what he gave them. The last is only able to give back the original amount. The king is very angry with him.

Notice they had to give back everything. This wasn’t a money making opportunity for them. They didn’t profit from this. They were just stewards of the king’s money.

This isn’t just about money. This is about any gift from God, which is everything. It is your abilities, your special skills, your strength, your time…everything.

God wants us to trust that God will provide. God wants us to trust that we are safe and provided for. God wants is to trust that God is in charge.

Basically, God wants us to trust God, in all things, all the time.

We aren’t in charge. God is.

We are here to use our gifts – time, talent, and treasure, to build up the kingdom of God. We are here to be good stewards our entire lives.

As long as we are not doing things for our own benefit and glory, we will thrive. When we become selfish and greedy, we will fail.

This isn’t about tithing money to a church. This is about serving God all the time, and trusting God all the time.

If we are called to do something by God, God will provide a way for it to happen. This is especially important to remember when we can’t see a way that is possible.

Look at Moses. God told him that he was going to lead Israel to safety across the Red Sea. That made no sense. How was that going to happen? God told Moses to take what he had, his staff, and use it. He did, and God worked through Moses and parted the sea so they could cross safely.

Discipline and order

Posted on July 16, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

I know someone who got very upset about the idea of having to do prayers. I’d told him about the Jewish idea of having to say 100 blessings a day. He didn’t think this was a good idea. He thought that it sounded oppressive.

But discipline and order are good things. If we impose order upon our lives we can get stronger in many ways. Otherwise we are formless.

If your leg is broken you put a cast on it to make it stronger. The cast gives it a shape to grow into so it doesn’t grow crooked.

If you have a bonsai tree you carefully shape it with wires to make it have a beautiful shape.

If you are pouring concrete you have to put a form down so that the concrete doesn’t go everywhere.

The same is true of tomatoes or of peonies. You have to give them something to grow up against so that they don’t grow wild.

When we impose a discipline to our lives we are making ourselves into disciples. We are making ourselves stronger by making ourselves fit into a particular form or mold, one that we know to be good for us. It isn’t something that we have to do but it is something that we should do.

It is just like with Peter when he was walking out on the water to Jesus, he said “Lord if you command me I will go”. Peter needed to be commanded by Jesus in order to walk on the water.

We too can work miracles if we allow ourselves to be commanded. We allow ourselves to be commanded by adopting order and discipline into our lives. We aren’t giving up control or free will at all. We are strengthening ourselves by allowing order into our lives.

Victim mentality

Posted on July 16, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

Thinking you are a victim makes it so. Have you ever heard the phrase “Whether you think you can or you can’t, you’re right.”? It is very true. Our attitude is very important.

We have to get past this idea of victimhood. We seem to have a society now that says that everybody is a victim. It says that nobody is responsible for their own lives and their own decisions. This is very unhealthy and unproductive.

It is essential that we take back control of our own lives. It is essential that we actually start taking our lives seriously. This isn’t about blaming other people for our failures and our failings. Sure, society may have tried to tell us that we can blame our parents or our genes or our teachers for our messed up lives, but really we don’t have to accept that. Blaming other people only shifts responsibility to them, and takes it away from us.

When we give away our power, we become passive agents in our own lives. Don’t blame anybody, even society. Don’t blame the media for selling the message, even. Just get going, and start living your own life.

Vicious circle – on codependency

Posted on July 16, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

I know a few people who are having a hard time accepting what is happening to them right now. I’m really worried, and I want to help them. If only they could accept the reality of the situation they are in, things will start to get better. If only they could stop hoping and wishing that things were different, they’d start to heal.

Sometimes we are the ones who have to make a change. Sometimes we are in bad situations that are presented to us because we are the ones who are supposed to fix them.

But sometimes things just can’t be changed. Sometimes things are just as they are, and there is no getting around them.

Sometimes the only way is to go through the grief and the pain, and to see it for what it is.

But then I realized I’m doing the very same thing. I’m not accepting the reality of the situation. I’m not accepting that their pain and inability to face it is in fact the reality.

It is all a great big circle of codependency.

Mr/S

Posted on July 16, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

I noticed something on a form recently for the first time. I don’t mean that I’ve never seen this before – I mean that I saw it with new eyes.

The form had a place for you to circle your title. Mr./Mrs./Miss

There are several things going on here. Notice that the male title is first.

Second – notice that there are two different titles for women, indicating whether you are married or not. There is a perfectly acceptable variant, “Ms.” that does not indicate marital status. Notice that men don’t have a different title if they are single or married.

And then I noticed it even more deeply. This is beyond hierarchy and status.

What do we even need these titles for? Why does it matter if someone is male or female?

Look at some of the names that are gender neutral. Robin, Terry, Dana, Tracy.

Do we treat people differently because of their gender, or status? If so, why?

Then I considered all the different names that I come across every day. Nashville is full of people from all around the world, and I don’t know all of their naming practices. I have no way of knowing if a name belongs to a female or a male. Does it matter?

Not really.

Food abuse

Posted on July 16, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

I see obesity as a symptom of food abuse. It is the same as alcoholism and drug abuse. It is a sign of an abuse or mis-use of food.

I used to be obese. I’ve had to work hard on relearning what (and how much) is healthy to eat and how to incorporate more movement and exercise into my life. But I’ve also had to work hard on addressing the root cause of why I wasn’t taking care of my body and my soul.

The problem is, we have to eat. We can’t just stop eating food. We can’t drop it like we can alcohol or cigarettes or any other addictive substance.

So we all need to develop a healthy relationship with food – and to address the issues that are causing us to use food to (not) solve our problems. Food can heal us, but it can also harm us if we use it improperly. It can be too much of a good thing, but it can also be the wrong thing.

Food wasn’t the only substance I had a wrong relationship with. Back when I smoked pot, I would smoke it to feel better. I’d have a bad day at work, or my family was hassling me, or there was some other stress to deal with. I’d smoke pot to numb the pain. It would ease the pain long enough that I’d forget about it, until I’d sober up again and the problems would come back. The thing is, the problems never went away in the first place. I just anesthetized myself to them. Instead of dealing with them, I ran away from them in my head. When I got sober, I’d still have those problems, and I’d still reach for pot to “fix” them.

It was a terrible cycle of stupid.

Plenty of people do the same thing with food. Because food isn’t seen as a drug, and because it is not only socially acceptable but normal to eat, food abuse is an easy addiction to pick up. And it isn’t like our society in general has a healthy relationship with food. Everything is super sized and fried. It is too much of a bad thing.

Is this fat shaming? No. Not any more than pointing out that someone who drinks to solve their problems is an alcoholic. This isn’t “blaming the victim” either. It is pointing out that when we use food to solve our problems, we are creating our own problems.

Victims are people who have things done to them. They are passive agents in the story. A person who gets hit by a car, or lightning, or something falling out of the sky is a victim.

If you hurt yourself, you aren’t a victim. You have done it to yourself. Thinking about why you do it is the wrong direction of thought. Blaming your parents or society or your friends for your action is self-defeating. You choose your life and your actions. You have control of what you do. You can also make a choice to change.

We need to start naming our demons so we can slay them. If we pretend like everything is fine then we will continue to kill ourselves bit by bit and bite by bite.

Food won’t fix our problems. Facing them will. No, it isn’t easy.

We have gotten into the habit of shoving our feelings and anxieties down, ramming them into our mouths with food. We have to learn how to let them out rather than shove them down. We have to learn that it is OK to speak up and be heard.

Praise as behavior modification

Posted on July 15, 2014 by betsybeadhead | Leave a comment

So, I’ve figured out a way to “train” someone without directly training them. There is this lady at work who doesn’t talk to anybody. Generally, she only talks if she has something to complain about. She is kind of intimidating in her silence. But sometimes I need to say something to her because how she is doing her job gets in the way of how I need to do my job.

If I want this non-communicative coworker to do something differently, I wait until she is doing something close to it and praise her for it. This is how you train dogs and preverbal children, after all.

Sounds a bit manipulative and indirect, I know. I still get what I want, and nobody’s feelings are hurt. In fact, she feels better because I just praised her.

She is a little hard to interact with. And when I say a little hard, I mean impossible. There might be some shyness, or curmudgeon, or stubborn, or self-conscious in there. She is very old. She rarely talks. She stutters when she does talk. She has never been married. She does not interact with others unless they too are very old and female. This is difficult, because there is only one other person there who meets that criteria right now. This job is a physically demanding one, and very old people just don’t stay.

Her normal interaction with people is to only speak when she thinks something is wrong. She always leads with “I don’t mean to complain, but…” and then she complains. We never hear from her otherwise. Then when we make whatever modification to make her happy, she still isn’t happy. We can’t win. She doesn’t even talk when greeted in the morning. A “Good Morning!” is met with averted eyes.

This is all a bit off-putting, and doesn’t lead to healthy interactions.

So, when she is doing something that gets in my way, something that I “don’t mean to complain” about, I don’t want to do it like she is doing it. I don’t want to add to the awkwardness. I’d rather do things in a nice way. The trouble was in figuring that out. How do I tell someone in a nice way that how they are doing their job makes my job harder? How do I do it when I can’t even say “Good morning!” to them and get a response?

I found my answer in dog and child training books. Both of these areas “train” by celebrating the positive. In both, you can’t tell the subject what to do, because the dog or the child isn’t able to understand words. But they are able to understand praise. So when they do something that you want them to do, praise them. When they do something you don’t want them to do, ignore them. Not punish, just ignore. Beings tend to seek praise, so they will repeat those behaviors that got them praise.

There is a huge area for making carts, but she doesn’t use it very much. She’ll take what she wants to work on to the bookshelves right behind the circulation desk. That area is where we pre-sort all the AV materials. It isn’t great that she is there because she is in the way. I haven’t figured out how to get her to not be there at all without causing a row. Sometimes you have to pick your battles.

But she has started to move her cart further and further into the little alcove where I go into the back room. That is a very narrow area and I need to be there a lot because that is where we sort books to go to other branches. This is a real problem. I want to be able to walk through here easily. I don’t want to have to shimmy or squirm or sidle through here.

I fumed about this for a long time. Then I learned about this technique. So I waited until she had her cart a bit less in my walking area, and I praised her for it. I commented on how it helped me if this area was clear.

And she started doing it all the time. She started taking her cart further back into that area, so she was even further out of my way.

Ideally, she’d not be there at all unless she was working on AV materials, but I’ll count my win.