You know the difference between in-laws and outlaws? Outlaws are wanted.
In-laws are like an arranged marriage. You didn’t pick them – they were picked for you. Sometimes it works out, and sometimes it doesn’t. It is great when it does, but it is horrible when it doesn’t.
You can’t drop them like you can drop a new friend.
With a new friend, one you are trying out, things might not work out the way you both hoped. You can just stop calling and making dates with each other.
Family is different. You are stuck with them. All the major holidays, all the big celebrations, you are expected to spend with your family. Thanksgiving. Christmas. Weddings. Funerals.
The most important days of your life, and you are stuck with people you didn’t pick.
This makes no sense.
The only thing that will make bad in-laws go away is divorce. Either you leave, or they do.
Or, better yet – re-invent the idea of holidays. Don’t make it mandatory to spend time with people you don’t like. Create new traditions. Invent your own ideas.
Being stuck with people you didn’t pick doesn’t make sense.
Perhaps this is why people hate holidays so much. They are expected to spend time with people they think, by society’s rules, that they have to get along with.
Why fake it anymore?