How does any change get done? Bit by bit. Piece by piece. It is totally impossible to make a sudden change for the better. Everything worth having takes a lot of time and a lot of effort.
Making any change is like starting a fire with a flint. You work really hard at the beginning, seemingly not doing anything. No flame is there. The desire is there, and the work is there, but there’s no flame. Then, suddenly, there’s a little spark. If you’ve prepared the area well with tinder, it will land on it and begin to burn. Then you have to have other small things to burn nearby. You have to protect that tiny little flame and feed it gently or you’ll lose it. Give it a huge log to chew on and it will die.
The same is true of good habits. You can’t go from nothing to something overnight. Start small. Add a little to it as you go. Build it up. Have patience with the process.
Just your desire to make a change in your life is a good start. It is the proof that you are working on it. But that is the flint.
Then you have to get some tinder nearby and a place for the fire. Have a few small tasks that you can do that will further your goal, whatever it is. Make sure they are small. Do a little of something. That will give you energy to do a little more.
You can’t make a fire just anywhere. You need to have a place for it. Likewise, you have to plan ahead and have a goal. You also have to know that you won’t get there immediately. This is normal and human. Wanting to do too much too fast will blow out the flame.
Sometimes the spark will fall to the side and not on the tinder. Sometimes things don’t go the way you meant for them to. Try again. Otherwise you’re going to be left in the cold.
Getting a lighter isn’t an option sometimes. Borrowing a torch from someone else also isn’t an option sometimes. Sometimes you have to start from scratch and you have to do all the hard work yourself.