28 | January | 2018 | betsybeadhead

I have been very anxious about the future – about getting older and needing help. I do not have children or a close family (“distant” isn’t just in miles). There is nobody on the horizon that I can count on to help me when I get older, if my husband dies before me. Or, say we are both old, and both need help. Who will help us?

I have long thought that there should be some sort of community, like a convent or a monastery, where people live and work and die together, as a kind of adopted family. But how to go about making that happen? People value their privacy and independence. People are wary of “religion”, yet it is a good center to a community.
We humans were not made to be alone. We lie to ourselves when we think we can do it all. We are not designed that way.

I have researched “co-housing” and similar communities. But I’m nearly 50. I take care of myself, but how long will it be until I need help? One broken bone, one car accident, and things change quickly. The system needs to be in place before that.

I love how religious people who live in community (monks and nuns) spend their lives together. They don’t go away to a nursing home – that facility is part of the property. It is an expected part of life. They don’t pretend that illness and death isn’t going to happen. I think it makes it easier to know that you won’t be tended by strangers – your own adopted family is taking care of you. Your home is there, with them, not shuffled away into some forgotten facility.

My recent Bible readings speak to the answer –

Psalm 142
I cry aloud to the LORD;
I plead aloud to the LORD for mercy.
I pour out my complaint before Him;
I reveal my trouble to Him.
Although my spirit is weak within me,
You know my way.
Along this path I travel
they have hidden a trap for me.
Look to the right and see:[a]
no one stands up for me;
there is no refuge for me;
no one cares about me.
I cry to You, LORD;
I say, “You are my shelter,
my portion in the land of the living.”
Listen to my cry,
for I am very weak.
Rescue me from those who pursue me,
for they are too strong for me.
Free me from prison
so that I can praise Your name.
The righteous will gather around me
because You deal generously with me.

Isaiah 51:12-14
“I am the One who comforts you.
Who are you that you should fear man who dies,
or a son of man who is given up like grass?
But you have forgotten the LORD, your Maker,
who stretched out the heavens
and laid the foundations of the earth.
You are in constant dread all day long
because of the fury of the oppressor,
who has set himself to destroy.
But where is the fury of the oppressor?
The prisoner is soon to be set free;
he will not die and go to the Pit,
and his food will not be lacking.”

They tell me to wait – that God’s idea of time is not my idea. They remind me that Abraham waited 30 years after he was promised an heir – long after he and his wife were past childbearing years. They remind me that I need to put God first and everything else will fall into place.

(Bible translations are HCSB)

I went on an adventure on my day off to sketch at Tulip Grove. It is an estate attached to the Hermitage, in Tennessee. It was the first time I’d had an opportunity to go back since getting my membership. It has been bitterly cold this winter – not conducive for outside activities.

When I go to a place to sketch, I like to walk around first and see what catches my eye.

Strangely, the most interesting thing about this locale wasn’t the building (which was locked) but the sundial / memorial in the back yard.

Here is my picture of it.

at TG1

Here is my sketch.

Tulip Grove Berry

This was sketched around 3:30 pm, Friday January 26^th, 2018. It was 56 degrees and sunny. The sun set in about an hour.

It says this on the stone (Marble? Granite?) base –

“The memory of Jane Berry Buntin and her son Horatio live on at Tulip Grove. Their home 1915 – 1964.”

Here is a picture from above –

at TG2

So who are (were) these people? Why were they living at Tulip Grove- a historical mansion? It had been built for Andrew Jackson Donelson – the heir to Andrew Jackson. He was his wife’s nephew – they never had children.

I did some research.

Jane Elizabeth Berry married Charles Erwin Buntin. They had four children – Charles Erwin (Jr.), Rachael Craighead, Horatio (Ratio) Berry, and William (Billie). They are listed in the book “Notable Southern Families, Volume 2”. Berry is the important line – all the wealth comes from her side. Horatio was a common name in her family.

Jane was born May 29, 1883 in Tennessee. Her parents were also from Tennessee.

Charles Sr. was born April 7, 1880 in Tennessee. His parents were also from Tennessee.

Charles Erwin Jr. was born January 5, 1909 (died May 3, 1985, at 76)

Rachel Craighead was born February 8, 1910 (died January 22, 2001, at 90)

Horatio Berry was born September 15, 1911 (died February 23, 1984, at 72)

William Allison was born January 24, 1914 (died November 2, 1996 at 82)

Jane and Charles bought Tulip Grove in 1914. It is 26.33 acres and has a mansion.

In the 1920 census both parents and all four children are living there.

Charles Sr. died July 3, 1932.

In the 1940 census, Jane is 56 and living with Horatio, who was 28 and William who was 25. They are all listed as employed as farmers, but there is no income listed. All three Buntins are listed as having completed the second year of college.

A white female housekeeper named Francis Hayes (38 years old, completed high school) is also living there.

The home value is listed as $35,000 in 1940.

In 1944 there is a lawsuit against Jane concerning property she owned at 306 and 308 Second Avenue North, which was leased to the Stephens Manufacturing Company, which started 1/1/1942. This means she was involved in real estate at least as early as 1942.

In 1962 she sold 175 to 200 acres in Hendersonville to Maddux Realty and Construction Company. She is listed in the article as “a descendant of the surveyor who gave Tennessee its namesake, Daniel Smith”. The Berry family owned what was Indian Lake (now part of Old Hickory Lake) – it was a land grant from the Revolutionary War that had remained in the family.

She was active in the Ladies’ Hermitage Association (LHA) and signed a warranty deed 3/11/1964 transferring Tulip Grove to the LHA with the agreement that she and her heirs were to be paid one-third of all gate receipts to Tulip Grove for 99 years, in monthly installments. If they didn’t make at least $600 within 6 months (except in the case of renovations or restoration) then the contract is null and void and the property returns to the heirs.

From 1965 to 2001 the family received $300,000. The LHA closed Tulip Grove to the general public in 2001 and paid the minimum amount of $600 every 6 months.

Her heir and granddaughter, Jane Berry Field, sued the LHA around 2011 because they hosted private paid events at Tulip Grove and didn’t give the family any proceeds from those events.

Jane died at age 98, Friday, July 3, 1981, while living at the Imperial House Apartments. She was buried in Mt. Olivet Cemetery, 1101 Lebanon Pike, Nashville TN. All four of her children were buried there as well.

The Imperial House Apartments were located near St. Thomas Hospital, and operated from 1963 to 2017, when they were demolished. They were damaged in the 2010 flood.

I still do not know why only Horatio is mentioned along with Jane on the memorial. Why are the other children not named?

Horatio was married to Willie Davis (Johnson) Buntin. She was born May 24, 1911 and died October 17, 2001. She is listed as “Mrs. Horatio Buntin” in a news article about President Lyndon Johnson (a distant relation of hers), when he visited the Hermitage in 1967. She is listed as a Regent of the Ladies Hermitage Association.