I’m starting to see all negative energy as the same thing as a toddler having a tantrum. Try to see the bad behavior, the bad event, as a thing, a force. Divorce it from the person or the situation.

Job loss, cancer diagnosis, divorce papers? See them as negative energy. In “The Neverending Story” by Michael Ende, it is called “The Nothing,” in “The Dark is Rising” series by Susan Cooper it is called “the Dark.” In Jewish lore it is called the yetzer hara, or “the evil inclination.” See it as a thing, a force. It isn’t that person, it isn’t the event. It is a force outside of the person and the event.

Just like with a bully or a toddler having a tantrum, don’t give it energy. Make sure nobody is going to get harmed, certainly, but don’t give this force any more power. Ignore it. Don’t let it take over.

This is easier said than done. But every time you do, you’ll get better at it. Instead of beating yourself up for forgetting to ignore it (that kind of behavior is what it wants), congratulate yourself every time you do remember (that drives it up the wall).

Or here is an alternative – learn to love that force. Don’t fight it. See it as a reminder to return to God. See it like a sanctus bell calling you to pray. Every time you recognize that force by noticing anger or fear or hatred, see it as a blessing because it awakens you.

Buddha is a title, not a name. It means the awakened one. Fear and anger and anxiety and stress can be used as a way to transform you into an awakened person. Eckhart Tolle tells us in “The Power of Now” that it is easier for a person who is having a lot of difficulties to become awakened. The person who is having an average life with no difficulties doesn’t know that she or he needs to awaken, so they slumber on, plodding through life unaware of the lessons that need to be learned.