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Making a fire

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Have you ever made a fire? Starting any new good habit is a lot like starting a fire. I don’t mean starting a fire with a fire log and a lighter. I mean starting a fire from scratch.

You have to gather together all the wood, kindling, and your matches. If you are really roughing it, you’ll use a flint. You have to have all the ingredients ready and nearby. Then you have to spend a lot of time getting it started. You’ll have a lot of failures, and maybe a lot of blisters. With a lot of hard work, you’ll have a fire too.

Then you have to keep it going. You have to pay attention to it – feeding it just enough wood at the right time. You can’t put in too much – that will smother the flame. If you put in too little, it will go out.

Starting a new habit or project that is meaningful is exactly the same way. You have to prepare before you even start. You have to work on it every day to get it going. You’ll have a lot of failures along the way, and it may not seem like it will ever get going. If you try to do too much at once, you’ll stall your project just the same as if you put too much wood on the fire. If you get too excited about how you’ve started, you’ll forget that you need to keep feeding the fire to keep it going.

The journey of a thousand miles.

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I have a tattoo that wraps around my left ankle that is a quote from Lao Tzu. I was inspired by a book I read called “Body Type” by Ina Saltz. The entire book features tattoos that are words, and often they are in meaningful fonts.

Like any self-respecting tattooed person, I was on the quest to get another tattoo after reading that. But what? What words would be worthwhile to get permanently marked on my body? What do I need to remember that much? What would be helpful to others?

I found something that answered those questions in the quote “The journey of a thousand miles begins beneath one’s feet.” I’d always heard it as “The journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step” but when you are going to get something permanent, you might as well make sure of the exact wording. When I looked it up, I found this alternate translation. I like “… beneath ones’ feet” much better.

Both quotes help to remind us to not look at the goal. Just get started. There is another Chinese saying that is like this. “The best time to plant a tree is a hundred years ago. The second best time is today.” Both refer to starting. You have to dream, but then you have to make those dreams real. And making dreams real is composed of a lot of tiny steps. When you first start it feels impossible, that you will never get there. Just keep going. Just keep taking tiny steps. The quote also reminds us to break up a big, difficult project up into manageable parts. Do a little here, and a little there, and you’ll get there.

But we all know that just starting is the hardest part. This is why I like the alternate translation so much better. The start is right now, right where you are. Here’s the secret – just thinking about it, you have already begun.

That is worth savoring. You want to write? Many people would say then just write. That is easier to say than do, because you want to make it perfect. You won’t. It won’t be perfect. It will be really ugly and clunky and dull at the beginning. But then you write more, and it gets easier, and clearer, and better. This applies to anything creative, not just writing.

But you still have to start.

I had a problem getting started. Sometimes the problem was stopping a bad habit and starting a better one. I know I’m not alone in this. Sometimes the inertia was too great. Sometimes I couldn’t achieve enough escape velocity to get going.

These words inspire me, and I hope they do the same to you. Just thinking about it, you’ve already started. You’ve already taken the first step.

Wake Up!

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Originally posted on Facebook August 26, 2012

Sometimes I’m not very charitable. I feel sad if folks are suffering because there was an accident. However – if folks are sick and hurting because they have refused to take care of themselves (they smoke, drink excessively, eat unhealthy foods, refuse to exercise) then that is different. I want to start yelling – WAKE UP! We aren’t doing each other any favors when we look the other way. A doctor really did me a favor when he found out I smoked (5 clove cigarettes every day). He literally got right in my face and yelled – Quit Smoking!

My Mom died at 53 from smoking 2 packs of cigarettes a day. What a stupid way to die. Friends are sick all the time due to bad choices. I see folks at the library who are morbidly obese and all they do every day is play games on the internet. They are literally wasting their lives. One says she comes to the library to play games because she doesn’t want to take care of things at her home. Those things will still be there – adding up. This is an addiction – I understand this all too well.

Quit being a slave to your body. Your body is like a 5 year old sometimes. It wants what it wants, and it wants it right now. Feed me candy! Sit on the couch! Watch stupid shows that waste time! Eat fried food! I don’t want vegetables – they are icky!

The train is coming. You can’t avoid it. Years and years of bad choices, of allowing your body to control you only result in pain and suffering. Death is inevitable. However it can be delayed, and you can have a good healthy life for many years if you choose wisely.

When I start exercising, the first 5 minutes I hate it. I don’t want to be there. In 10 minutes I think I’ve been there for 25, and I want to stop. I push on. In 30, I think it isn’t so bad, and I can do more. In 40, I start to be sad that it is almost over. At 60 minutes I’m done and I feel great.

I’ve started to realize that this pattern is the same with starting anything. The first time you start something good for you, there is a lot of resistance. You do it a little longer, and you think why am I doing this – there’s no results, this is stupid. If you keep at it – you start to get into it and you feel better. Your mind plays tricks on you – be stronger than your mind.

There are so many excuses to be made for not following the healthy path. Excuses lead to misery.

Wake up. Choose to live. Choose to be alive and awake and healthy. This is all a process. You won’t get there overnight. Every day you will have to make choices. You will fall, you will fail. The difference is – get back up and start again.

Our taste buds have been taught in our Western society to want a high-fat, high salt diet. This can be weaned out of you so that you actually prefer healthy food.

Drink more water. Work towards not having any sodas.

Eat more vegetables. Try to eat fresh ones – not processed. Aim for a “rainbow” of color on your plate.

You really don’t need three plates of food at the buffet.

Eat slower. Chew your food. The slower you eat, the more you will digest, and the sooner you will realize you are full – and you won’t overeat.

Choose organic when possible. Yes, it is more expensive. Choose what you can, and have the rest be conventional. Every little step counts.

Avoid fried foods. Batter adds only fat and salt and no nutrition.

If you eat meat, go for chicken and seafood.

Walk more. Figure out ways you can walk more at work. Park further away from the store. Wear a pedometer so you have an idea of how far you are walking every day.

Try water aerobics. It is good for your joints, and it offers resistance training and cardio exercise at the same time.