individual | betsybeadhead

What is Your name?
Not the name of Your disease
not the name others have called You.

Your name that is
Special and star-like
Blessed and beautiful,
Your name
for You alone?

It might have been a long time
since You have heard it.
It might have been never.

The names others have given You
might not be true
might not fit
in the same way that
hand me down clothes
Don’t.

In the same way that
sometimes You have to
make Your own clothes
stitch
by
stitch
to have something
that fits
sometimes You have to
Discover
Uncover
Recover
Your name.

You might not be the name
You were given at birth.

You might not be
mother, brother,
day labor, CEO,
friend, failure
gambler, penny pincher
mentally ill, stable
ex con, confidante.

The names that stick to You
(or are stuck on You)
out of relationship
or habit
or job
or history
or health
might be a part of Your name
or Your name might be
Entirely apart
from them.

What is Your name
Your true name
deep inside Your heart
small and bright and solid
And beautiful?
Immovable
Unchanging
Eternal
like the stars
like the sea.

The vastness of forever is inside you.

Find Your name
And You find Yourself
again
or for
the first time.

Maybe it is best if we all stop pretending to be the same. Maybe if we all stop faking that we are “normal” we will all get to actually be who we really are for a change.

The more we all get cosmetic surgery to average out ourselves, the more the oddball doesn’t know he is normal.

Blind in one eye? Wear sunglasses or a patch.

Have one leg shorter than the other? Wear a lift.

Butt too big? Wear compression underwear.

Boobs too small? Wear padding.

When we smooth and stuff and shave and shape our bodies to fit some imagined idea of “normal” we have stopped being normal.

We do the same with our emotional lives. We say we are fine when we aren’t. We pretend to be on an even keel when we are angry, sad, hurt. We fake it so often we don’t know what we really feel anymore.

Who are we trying to appease/impress? Ourselves, or them? What if they are faking it too, for the same reason? It takes too much energy to be fake.

We need to stop faking it so we can start to make it for a change.

When we start being ourselves, we give everyone else permission to be themselves too. We let them know it is OK to take off their masks when we take off our own.

It is scary, at first, for us and for them. But all change and growth is scary at first. Some people might feel threatened by your new-found honesty and freedom. Be yourself anyway.