Elevator

Today I’m going to meet Anne Lamott. She is signing her new book at the main branch of my library system. She is the author of “Traveling Mercies,” “Grace, Eventually,” and “Plan B.” All of these contain her thoughts on faith. She and Sara Miles are two of my favorite Christian authors. They both get into the trenches of faith and don’t pull any punches about how hard it is to live this life.

So many Christian authors talk about how wonderful their life got when they became Christian. They write that everything got better and easier. They live in really nice houses and drive really big cars. They write about the huge churches they started and how their congregation is growing every week.

This doesn’t synch up with what I’ve experienced.

I do not know what floor they got off on when they got on the elevator of Christianity. They must have gotten off on the floor that was marked “fancy stuff” and “easy street.” When I got on the elevator, I got off on the “broken people” floor. I got off on the “time for hard work” floor.

So many authors I’ve read have left me feeling like I didn’t do it right. That maybe I didn’t press the button hard enough. Maybe my prayers weren’t heard because I wasn’t trying correctly. Maybe my connection is faulty.

I feel like Anne Lamott and Sara Miles are my sisters in the trenches. They talk openly about how hard it is to be a Christian. Things break. New things don’t just start appearing. People are mean. Sometimes those people are the ones you go to church with. From reading Anne and Sara’s work, they’ve let me know I’m not alone in my experience. They’ve let me know it is OK for me to write about it too. They’ve affirmed me, and given me permission.

I feel that once you become a Christian, everything gets harder. You are aware of your responsibility. You realize how much you have not done well and it is time to make amends. It is like getting sober. In AA, part of the twelve steps is making amends to those people you wronged when you were drunk. Now you are aware of all the damage you’ve done, and now you have to try to fix it. There is no twelve step program in Christianity, or at least, not openly. But the same rules apply. “Love your neighbor as yourself” is the same thing. Part of showing love is making amends. You have to go rebuild that bridge if possible.

Anne and Sara both tell about how hard it is to go slogging into that muddy, raging river and digging up those stones to try to rebuild the bridge. They talk about how the person on the other side yells at you because they like the broken bridge just like it is, thank you very much. That person hasn’t been through the same experience you have, so he doesn’t want the bridge rebuilt.

But what about those who have decided to follow Jesus? Is it any easier to live and work with them? No. Not at all. You’d think we’d all be on the same team, working from the same playbook. You know, same Lord, same Bible. You’d be wrong, sadly. There are many times where I wonder what they are thinking when they say and do crazy things.

I just read about a lady who objects to the term “Deviled eggs” and they call them “Jesus eggs” in her house. It is this kind of stuff that I’m talking about. Then there are people who slaughter elephants to then take the ivory from their tusks and carve them into statues of Jesus. I can’t even begin to tell you how horrified I was when I read that story in National Geographic. It was a blog post from a local Rabbi that gave words to my feeling. Rabbi Rami Shapiro said “True religions teach you to see the Lord in the elephant, as the elephant, and not collude in the murder of the elephant to honor your Lord. Jesus died for your sins, not to excuse them.”

I’m not ready to throw the baby out with the bathwater. I think that Christianity has gotten a bad reputation, and it is often due to really whacked-out Christians. I feel the need to apologize for all of Christianity. We have sinned against God and our neighbors by not showing love. We have gotten sucked into the materialism. We have gotten greedy. We have gotten tripped up by the legalistic nature of religion. We’ve forgotten that Jesus came to fulfill the law – but by getting to the heart of it. Rather than fulfilling the letter of the law, he fulfilled the spirit of it. He worked on the Sabbath to heal a crippled man. So he broke one rule, but honored the real rule.

We humans often lack Jesus’ keen insight into what we are supposed to do. This is an understatement. The bad part is that there are a lot of sins that we Christians do, and we do them in the name of God. We are hostile to people who aren’t Christian. We are hostile to people who are Christian but aren’t members of our denomination. We are hostile to people who are in our denomination but don’t share our views. We argue over interpretations of the Bible – should we or shouldn’t we do this? We argue over whether we should have stained glass. We argue over whether women should be ministers. We argue over how old the Earth is. We argue over who can receive Communion.

We forget that everything that Jesus did was to teach us to love each other. To be servants.

Father, forgive us, for we know not what we do. Please send your Holy Spirit to us so that we can truly hear Your Word and be Your Body on this Earth. Give us the knowledge and strength to mend the divisions between us. Give us patient hearts to be loving and kind to everyone, seeing everyone as Your child. I ask this in the name of your Son, Jesus.

God is Love

I used to be a bigot against gay people. Oh, sure I had gay friends. I was nice to all the gay customers at work. But, deep down, I was a bigot. That is the true name for it. I think it is important to be honest.

Plenty of people aren’t honest with themselves. They won’t admit that they are bigots. Plenty of people will say that they don’t judge gay people, but they just don’t approve of their lifestyle. They will use that “love the sinner, hate the sin” line. They will quote chapter and verse in the Old Testament section of the Bible where it says that homosexual behavior is an “abomination.” They will quote chapter and verse from a letter of the apostle Paul saying something similar.

I had been out of the Episcopal Church for a long time – I’d been out of church in general. When I returned a few years ago I learned about the schism that had been caused after the election of an openly gay, partnered gay man as a Bishop. This was in New Hampshire. Plenty of people left the church. They would rather leave the church than be a part of something they felt was wrong. I respect their right to do that. It is important to have choices and to be able to stand up for what you believe. I admit that I was a bit wary when I rejoined the church. This Bishop was not over my diocese, but I still thought about it. What if it happened here? And to be a Bishop, you have to be a priest first. What would I think if the priest in my church was gay?

Then I thought well, there’s the whole idea of sin in general. How much sin can any priest be a part of and I’m still OK with that? What if a priest is having an affair? What if a priest is an alcoholic? What is an acceptable level of sin? Are some sins bigger than others? And does it make it worse if the sin is openly admitted, and not even thought of as a sin?

Sure, I knew the line from Romans 3:23 “for all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God,” (NIV) and also Ecclesiastes 7:20 ”Indeed, there is no one on earth who is righteous, no one who does what is right and never sins.” (NIV) So that’s easy. We all sin. Everyone is a sinner. And sin is sin – there is no greater sin or lesser sin. It is an impurity, a “missing the mark.” It is any time you fail to act in the way that you know to be best.

Then I started to think about all the rules that went away when Jesus came. Things that were a big deal before him became non-issues. There are 613 commandments that Orthodox Jewish people must follow. The Ten Commandments are just a start. Everything changed with Jesus. After Jesus, men no longer had to cover their heads or have beards. It was totally OK to eat bacon. You could eat beef and cheese together. It was OK to mix wool and linen fibers when creating a garment.

Jesus boiled down everything to just two rules. He stripped it all away and made it a lot easier to follow. Matthew 22:37-40 tells us when He was asked what is the greatest commandment, “Jesus replied: “ ‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.” (NIV)

These words really got into me. They changed how I view sin. They changed how I view my relationship with my neighbor.

As Christians, we follow Christ. The rules of the Old Testament no longer apply. The opinions of Paul that are in the Epistles are only useful if they support what Jesus said.

What did Jesus say about homosexuality? Nothing. What did He say about judging others? Lots.

What did Jesus say we are to do? Show love. Love God, and love our neighbors. It is all about love.

Thus, being homosexual is not a sin. It is not in violation of either rule.

Thus, being judgmental against homosexuals is a sin. Saying that how they live is sinful is in fact, a sin. Making or allowing rules or laws to exist that are against them so that they are not equal members of society, is sinful.

I am pro gay rights BECAUSE I am a Christian.

Thanks be to God.

Unclean!

I’ve heard a lot of testimonies about people who have become Christian. They say that their lives have become easier. They gave their lives over to God and it all got easier.

I don’t know what they are talking about. I think it gets harder.

In my opinion, when you become a Christian, you become awake. You are aware of the awesome responsibility that you have to be a force for good in the world. You switch from being passive to active.

Yes, there is a sense of your “Higher Power” as they say in AA. You aren’t in charge (and you never were), and you know that God is in charge. You can relax in that sense. And there is the sense that once you are saved, you are then set for when you die. You know where you will go.

But what about in between now and then? Do you just get to sit back and be smugly happy that you’ve got “it” and others don’t? Is being Christian some ugly game of musical chairs, where the loser gets condemned to an eternity in Hell? That doesn’t sound very nice. It also doesn’t sound very Christian. Not really. Not in the true sense of the word.

It does sound like the modern brand of Christian, unfortunately. There are plenty of folks who wear that name like a shield against the rest of the world. They use it like a “get out of jail free” card. They feel like it means they are set – they will live forever. But they then are arrogant about it. They lord The Lord over people. But life isn’t a game of Monopoly. It really isn’t about getting and buying more stuff and about screwing over other people on the way.

When I became Christian I didn’t get a full grasp of what it meant, and I suspect that I still don’t know the full depth of what my responsibilities are. I certainly don’t feel like I do it right all the time. I feel like it is a process, and instead of “Being” Christian, it is more like I’m “Becoming” Christian. It feels like every year I grow deeper into my faith and closer to understanding what the Bible means. I still find the idea of Jesus as “The WORD made flesh” really interesting and I think I have no real clue what that means. I think I have a glimmer of a hope of understanding it.

I feel like the most important thing about being a Christian is that it isn’t a free pass to Heaven. It is marching orders to the front lines of Hell. We are called to be Christ’s Body in this world. Literally. We are His arms and His legs. When folks say “How could God let that happen”, the real answer is “How can we, agents of God, let that happen?” We are to be a force for good. We are to bring forth God’s love. We are to let God work through us.

Jesus didn’t hang out in the swank part of town. He didn’t buy a huge mansion and wall himself off from the world. He was a man of the people. He walked out among average, everyday people who were lost and hungry and sick. He got right in the middle of the tangled knots of life and untangled them. He was a hands-on kind of guy.

He touched lepers. Nobody did that. Lepers were “unclean” in all the ways possible. They had an infectious skin disease that meant they had to live outside of the camp with other lepers. They didn’t get to see their families. They didn’t get to hang out with their friends. It was a lonely existence. They had to wear bells to announce they were lepers to anyone who might come near. If you touched a leper, then you too were considered “unclean.”

But Jesus didn’t care about that. He not only associated with lepers, He touched them, and He didn’t catch leprosy. He healed them.

It makes me wonder, how much of their healing was just being acknowledged by another person? How much of the healing was just being noticed AS a person? Every single person Jesus healed was precious to Him. He violated so many rules that were in place at that time – touching lepers, dead people, women who had menstrual problems. Any one of these conditions would render a person unclean in those days. None of these rules stopped him.

Jesus not only showed us what to do, he empowered us to do it. He showed us that we are to heal others. He gave power to heal to His disciples and through the power of apostolic succession we have that power too. Through the power of the Holy Spirit we have it. Be assured – if you are Christian, you have that power.

So what is our modern day leprosy? What are the conditions that people find themselves in that make them excluded from society? What conditions make people pariahs? What conditions create invisible social walls that make people “unclean” in our society’s eyes? Thus – what places are we called to break down those walls and build bridges?

How about mental illness? How about being a single mother? How about AIDS? How about being gay? There are others, but this is a good start.

If you are a Christian, you have the power to heal. You have within you the means to bring forth God’s mercy and healing. All you have to do is let it happen. You don’t need special training. Just pray, and Jesus will show you how. It is that easy, and that hard. It is terrifying at first. It goes against all of our social rules. Don’t talk to strangers. Don’t get involved. Don’t make a scene. We are called to be in the world, but not of the world. The rules of society no longer apply. Jesus broke rules all the time. We are called to do the same. This often means getting out of your comfort zone. This often means taking a risk. It isn’t easy, but it is essential.

Now, it isn’t about passing judgment, and it certainly isn’t about passing laws against people. These actions create separation. We are called to bring together all the lost sheep. We are to show love and kindness and mercy to everyone. We are not to tell others that what they are doing is wrong in our opinion. We are to love them. By loving them, we are healing them. We are healing the rifts that divide people into “us” and “them”.

How do you bring forth healing? One way is to treat every person as if they are Jesus in disguise. This is how Mother Theresa acted. She felt that it was her honor to wash Jesus’ wounds when she washed a leper. She held Jesus in her arms when a frail elderly person died. You don’t have to work at a non-profit to do this. You can do this in your everyday job. Treat each person fairly and kindly. Don’t gossip. Be patient. Show actual interest in each person. Give each person your full attention and your time. When you start doing this you may find it is a little overwhelming and exhausting. Keep it up. It gets easier. It is just like exercise – you get stronger the more you do it.

We are given two commandments – love God, and similarly, love your neighbor as yourself. Every person is a child of God. Every person has within her or him a spark of the light of God. So, treat every person with kindness and respect and love. In Matthew 22:37 we hear these words from Jesus – “You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.” We, as Christians, are called to show the same focus and intensity to “the least of these”, to the “unclean”, to everyone.

Beads are prayers

The English word “bead” comes from the Anglo-Saxon word “biddan” meaning “to pray.” A woman was said to be “doing her beads” when she was using her rosary. Beads and prayers are the same thing. Sometimes I like to express certain religious ideas in bead form. This was the original intent of this blog, but I couldn’t figure out how to add pictures. Thanks to help from a coworker and some dogged persistence on my part (and no thanks to two different WordPress books), I’ve figured out how to marry up words and pictures. Here are two examples of how I speak in bead, when it comes to religious topics.

This necklace is referencing two verses from the Gospels. The fish refer to when Jesus said to his new-found disciples “I will make you fishers of men” (Matthew 4:19). The grape leaf and the purple bead together (a symbolic grape) refer to when He said “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” (John 15:5) (translations from the New International Version)

I also like the medal. It is a Sacred Heart medal. Rather than being a crucifix that depicts Christ’s agony on the cross, the Sacred Heart shows us the depth of His love for us. It also reminds us that we are to create within our own hearts a sanctuary for Jesus.

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This bracelet depicts the world before and after Jesus. Start at the bottom at the 6 o’clock position and go counter-clockwise to follow the story. The small dark green bead represents the beginning of the Jewish people. The large green bead (both are antique watermelon beads) represents their many years waiting for a Messiah. Then the red bead is for the Holy Spirit, next to the blue bead for Mary. This combination symbolizes humanity saying Yes to God’s requests for us to bring forth His love into this world. The following bead has all three colors of green, red, and blue. It is the merging of history and destiny – Jesus as the culmination.

jesusbracelet

I believe it is good to have prayers made visible.

The History of the Church, in beads.

I’m attempting to explain the history of the Church in bead form. I apologize for the dark pictures – this is a work in progress. (edit – I’ve added new pictures that are brighter. )

Here is a picture that gives an idea of what the whole thing looks like.

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And another –
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It all starts with the cross.

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Then the large fancy beads near it represent the Byzantine era. I chose blue, purple, and red because those were the colors God said to use for the Holy Temple in Jerusalem.

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This section represents the Middle Ages. One church, so one unifying pattern. Lapis lazuli represents the material used by monks in their illuminated manuscripts. The red is antique “white hearts” from the African trade to remind us of history and time.

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Here is another picture of this section –
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This section has the three colors of the temple, but it is casual and a little jumbled. There is a pattern if you look hard. This is now, the age of strip-mall churches and Mega churches.

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And also here –
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Pure and unadorned, the color in this section has the best of blue and purple to it, and was started off with red, the color of the Holy Spirit. Blue is also the color of Mary – a human being who said Yes to God and allowed The Divine to work through her to bring forth healing and redemption to our world. This is the future. This is what we as the Church are being called to.

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Better lit –
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What is “Christian”?

Rene Descartes talked about the color teal. You can tell someone what is blue and what is green, but they won’t understand what “teal” is unless you tell them what it isn’t. They need a boundary. You have to show them what is no longer blue enough but just green enough that it is teal. For instance, peacock green is teal. Emerald green is not.

The church is the same way. We have reached a point where it is important to draw the line between what is Christ-like and what is not.

There are people around today that are calling themselves Christians. They band together and say they are part of a church. Perhaps you know the group I’m referring to. I refuse to name them because I refuse to give them any more press. That is what they thrive on. They are like bad toddlers. They love attention and will resort to throwing a terrible tantrum. They throw their tantrums by protesting at military funerals. They carry signs that say things like “God hates (fill in the blank)” They are illogical in their actions. They are an embarrassment. There is nothing Christian about their actions.

Now maybe they are doing the rest of the church a favor. Let’s go with the idea of the Church as the Body of Christ. The apostle Paul talked about how each part does what it has to do and it is not for the other parts to feel jealous. The head can’t do anything without the arms and legs to take it where it needs to go. The arms and legs can’t do anything without the head directing them. All the parts of the body are mutually dependant.

Perhaps this group is the asshole. Every body has one, so why not this Body? It is important to get the waste out. It is important to remove the parts that are not helpful. Perhaps by their over-the-top actions they are showing us the worst we can be. Perhaps by viewing why they think they think that the term “Christian” applies to them, we can see how far off the track we have gotten.

The Christian church has gotten a lot of bad press recently, and it is its own fault. To many non-Christians, the word “Christian” is synonymous with self-centered, ignorant, and judgmental. This is entirely the opposite of what Jesus intended. He wanted us to be servants – to be His body in this world. He wanted us to do God’s will, in the same way that He did. He wanted us to be submissive to God and to treat everyone as if they are our neighbors.

Everyone. We are to treat everyone as our neighbors. Muslim, Jewish, Hindu, gay, homeless, drug addicted, mentally ill – you name it. Everyone who is not us. That is part of the meaning of neighbor – if they were part of our family, they would be living with us. Neighbors are everyone else, but they are close enough that they are still part of us. They aren’t necessarily friends, but they are fellow humans. We have a relationship with them, often by accident. We don’t choose our neighbors, we choose the house.

And here’s the biggest thing I want to try to get across. Not everyone has to be Christian, or follow Christian rules. WE have to be Christian. We have to serve them as Christ would. We do not have the right to impose our belief system on them, especially in the laws we create. To expect that other people follow a particular religious belief system that is not their own is exactly the same as Sharia law. Americans are deeply concerned that Muslim-influenced laws will begin to creep into our society. We don’t want to be forced to pray towards Mecca five times a day. We don’t want men to not be allowed to shave their beards. We don’t want women to be forced to cover themselves from head to toe.

Then why is it OK for Christians to try to make laws that push their belief system on others? Abortion. Gay marriage. The death penalty. These are hot-button issues. People are varied in their opinions. While one person’s viewpoint is perfectly valid according to their belief system, it is opposite another person’s also perfectly valid viewpoint. What I believe is for me to follow. I do not have the right to force you to follow my beliefs.

Take abortion for instance. I personally am against abortion. I see it as murder of an innocent. But – I will not take away someone else’s right to it. I feel that every child should be a wanted child. What I would rather focus on is better sex-education and better contraception. I believe that nobody ever wants to go through the ordeal of abortion – so I’m more interested in them never having to make that decision.

As for gay marriage, I’m for it. I’ve never understood the reasons that Christians have against gay marriage. If you don’t want to be married to a gay person, then don’t be married to a gay person. This seems simple enough. The same can be said of abortion – if you are against abortion, don’t have one.

I think what may be the issue with many Christians who are against gay marriage is that they are against homosexuality in general. They quote from Paul’s letters and from the Old Testament about injunctions against homosexuality. But they seem to miss the fact that Jesus, our Lord, says nothing about homosexuality, and says a lot about not judging other people. It isn’t our place to tell others what we think they are doing wrong. It is our place to do what we know to be right, and part of that is to show love. There is nothing loving about telling someone they are going to hell. There is nothing loving about excluding someone from your family or fellowship because of who they love.

Another issue is the idea of women in church. For many denominations, women cannot be ministers. This is following on the ideas of the apostle Paul, not of Jesus. Now, I’m not a Paulian. I’m a Christian. So if what Paul says adds to the message of Christ, then I’m for it. If it takes away from the message of Christ, then it is not helpful. I think it is important for people to read the Bible for themselves and to use the brain that God gave them, rather than expect their minister or their denomination to tell them how to think. When I read the Gospels for myself I found a lot about love and acceptance and not judging. I read a lot of stories about Jesus appreciating the service and ministry of women.
The bad part is that the loudest people get all the attention. They are hostile and rude, and are sullying the name of Jesus. They are bearing false witness to who Jesus is. But they are reminding us that we need to be able to think for ourselves and to make a point of countering their bad actions with good actions. We need to get out the word that Jesus came to show love, and we do that by showing love. I don’t hate the rude people who say they are Christians. I pray for them.

Deaf to God.

What is it that people don’t get about God? Why do they see God as a magic trick or an imaginary friend? Why do they think of believers as chumps? Why are the words “believers” and “freethinkers” opposites?

I can’t ever not remember believing in God. I have always known of God. If faith is believing in things not seen then yes I have faith – because I have not seen God but I still know He’s real. I hear Him. I feel His presence. I know He listens to my prayers. But just because my eyes don’t perceive Him doesn’t mean I don’t know of His reality.

Now, to clarify, I don’t see God as a Him or a Her. God is the Creator. God is above gender. God doesn’t need anything or anyone else to create. But our language doesn’t have a third person singular designation for something that is genderless other than “it” and that word just doesn’t have the weight and presence I feel is needed when talking about the Creator. And as to the term “God” – it is a descriptive. I remember someone getting very angry with me and saying “He has a name!” Yes. But which one? “I am that I am,” or “I am” or “YHWH” or “Yahweh” or “Jehovah” or “The God of Abraham and of Isaac and of Israel”? Our Jewish friends feel it is rude to say the name of God. They will write “G_d” or they will say words like “Hashem” which means “The Name.” The Arabs have 99 names for God, which really describe His qualities. God is Love – that is an appropriate name too.

I know is that it is comforting to know that I am not driving the bus. I am not in charge. Something larger than me has it all worked out. My goal is to get closer and closer to this Creator and align myself with Him. I remember having some rune stones when I was younger and one of the explanations for a particular rune was “I will to will Thy will.” I think that sums it up well. I’ve heard it is better to want what you get rather than to get what you want.

I’m OK with the idea of not doing something “right”. I’m ok with “messing up”. I’m ok with it not coming out like I thought it would. Because that too is part of the plan. “All things work together for good for those who follow God,” so the apostle Paul tells us. All things. Even the stuff you don’t think is OK. Judas was filling his role when he betrayed Jesus. He wasn’t in his right mind. It was as if he was possessed. And then, he came to. When he realized what he had done he killed himself. But his actions were prophesied by the prophet Isaiah. Betrayed by a friend for 30 pieces of silver. It had to happen that way. So even “bad” has to happen. Sometimes it is our need to define a situation as “bad” or “good” that becomes a problem in itself.

I used to feel really self-conscious about what I feel is my calling. I first heard the voice of God at 12 while standing in my back yard in Chattanooga. What I heard I would do has perturbed and confused me for the rest of my life so far. It doesn’t even seem possible. It doesn’t make sense. Adding to it – I’m bipolar. I was diagnosed at 30, but I had the first signs of it at 17. I’ve talked to psychiatrists who were also priests (that’s a trick to find) to see if that was a sign of the disease. You know what I mean. Lilly Tomlin tells us that if God talks to us, we are crazy. This is what society says. Yet we take seriously the stories of Abraham, Isaac, Noah, Isaiah, and Moses talking with God face to face. We don’t even question that it happened. So why can’t this happen to us, now? These stories should be considered blueprints – not myths. Here’s how you know that God is calling you. Listen. It isn’t just a story.

Samuel lived in a time where God hadn’t spoken in a while. He had to be taught what to do in that situation. “Speak Lord, for your servant is listening,” is what he was told to say the next time he heard his name called out by God. Perhaps we need to say this. Perhaps we need to stop talking so much. Perhaps we need to turn off the talk radio and the reality TV and put down the latest thriller novel. Perhaps we don’t do this because we are afraid of what we might hear.

I think we would rather sleepwalk through our lives than hear God’s voice. And we don’t even have to hear it to know what to do. We have the Bible to tell us.

There was a homeless guy from Poland named Bogdam who had sort of moved into the post office that is in my neighborhood. He was very pleasant and about 60 years old. He seemed content. I had made a point of talking with him every time I saw him. One day I had picked up supper for myself at Captain D’s and was on my way home. The post office was on the way, and I started thinking about Bogdam. I prayed – God, should I give him my supper? Send me a sign. And instantly the answer was – you have a sign. You have the whole of the Gospel telling you to “feed my sheep”. You don’t need anything else. Of course give him your supper.

So perhaps we don’t often hear the voice of God because we ignore the message we already have with us. We know what to do. Now it is time to take it seriously.

On Maundy Thursday and Remembering

“Maundy Thursday” is Thursday, March 28th this year. It is always the Thursday before Good Friday. “Maundy” is from the Latin word mandatum. It is where we get our word “mandatory,” meaning something that you must do. On that day we reenact and recall the first Lord’s Supper, where Jesus instructed his disciples on how to remember him. That meal is a remembrance in the truest sense of the word.

A few months ago I was listening to a podcast called “Paradosis” by Father John Hainsworth, an Orthodox priest. He was taking issue with the idea of the English word “remember” that is used to describe what happens in Communion. He was taking the word “remember” to mean the opposite of “forget”. He thought of it meaning that we remind ourselves what happened in that upper room during the first Lord’s Supper. His argument was that we don’t remember. We relive. It is happening right there, then, with us there. There is an alteration of space and time and we are there with Jesus and his disciples, and they are there with us in our own churches. We are all together with each other in spirit.

I think that is a perfectly valid understanding. But “remember” is a good word. In this sense it means really the opposite of “dis-member” Another word for our limbs is “members.” When you dis-member a body, you chop off the arms and the legs. All the parts of it are removed from the trunk. The parts that do the work are removed. When a doctor reattaches a limb that has been chopped off, he is actually “re-membering” a “dis-membered” limb. He is putting a member back. When we take communion, we are rejoined with Jesus. He is the body, and we are the arms and legs. We do His work in this world.

He tells us that he is the vine, and we are the branches. In the Gospel of John chapter 15 verse 5 we are told that “I am the vine; you are the branches. If you remain in me and I in you, you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing.” When we are rejoined in Communion, we are stronger. We gain sustenance. We are refueled. We gain the strength to do God’s work in our communities and in our world.

Jesus appeared to two of his disciples on the road to Emmaus after his resurrection. The three of them talked for a long time. They didn’t recognize him physically. They didn’t recognize him by how he talked and what he talked about, as he explained all that was said about himself in the Scriptures from Moses and the Prophets. The recognized him in his action of blessing and breaking bread. In the Gospel of Luke, chapter 24, verses 30-31 we hear that “ 30 When he was at the table with them, he took bread, gave thanks, broke it and began to give it to them. 31 Then their eyes were opened and they recognized him, and he disappeared from their sight.” Not by sight or sound or reason did they recognize him. He was there with them and they didn’t know. These are his own disciples, his hand-picked followers who knew him intimately. It was only in the blessing and breaking of the bread that they were truly rejoined with him. The same is true with us. It is in that simple, human experience of sharing a meal with our Lord in a community of believers that we can truly be re-connected and re-vitalized.

(all translations of the Bible are from the New International Version)

Ideal Church

Here are some of my ideas about what I think church should be and look like.

No hierarchy of leadership. Everybody can teach and preach if so called.

People are taught how to find and express their gifts of the Spirit.

People learn that they don’t have to work for a non-profit to be serving God. All forms of work can be valid paths.

No infant baptism. There can be a ceremony to accept children into the church – to say that the parents will raise them as Christians and want the support and help of the church. But baptism is too important for it to be done for you. You need to make that conscious decision yourself.

No peer pressure to get baptized or confirmed – it is open to all at any time. It isn’t just done once a year with all people over a certain age.

Full immersion baptism.

Communion every week.

Communion table is in the center – not at the end. No sense of distance – that it is special and you aren’t.

Money is not handled during the service. Parishioners give their tithes online or mail it to the church.

The service isn’t so weird that strangers can’t figure it out.

The service isn’t so boring that old-timers get tired of it.

The service changes with the seasons – liturgical, colors.

All major events are noted, and some smaller events. Note how some Hindu festivals are done – some are every three years, some 7, some 11. They aren’t all crammed into one year. If some Christian services are like this they will feel even more special.

Prayer is held every day in the sanctuary.

I really like the idea of incense, bells, and chanting at some services, not all. (otherwise strangers will feel excluded)

Money isn’t spent on expensive stained glass and vestments. It is spent on the poor.

Prevention rather than cure – time, energy spent on trying to prevent poverty, abuse.

A center for community education to raise people up. How to be good parents and good people.

Ministry is service to all, not just the “chosen” and not just those in church.

Honest facing of our corporate existence – health, both mental and physical. Birth, death, sex – no shame in the body.

Estate planning – and how to handle being a widow or a widower. Preparation for what it means to be married, or to be a parent. These major life events shouldn’t be a surprise or learned about after the fact.

Ignorance equals fear. There needs to be an emphasis on education.

Exercise and nutrition should be taught. How to keep the body healthy. Stress reduction such as yoga. Different ways of how to express yourself should be taught – art, music.

We are all one – now. Christ makes us so. “Full Communion” is in your head. It doesn’t require a committee or a vote from bishops.

Equal opportunity for membership – you show up on a regular basis, you are a member. You don’t have to be confirmed. Plenty of folks get confirmed and quit showing up, but are still counted as members.

The church gauges its success on the amount of people it has helped, not on the amount of money it has raised to support itself.

No bureaucracy – all can vote on everything. No vestry. This is more like the New England town hall idea of voting.

All are welcome to take communion. If Jesus calls you to the table, who are we to set limits or rules? Baptism is not required. Also, it is not for us to judge sinfulness or contrition. We cannot refuse communion.

No forcing people to get information in ways they aren’t familiar with. News and information should be online AND in print form.

Equal access for disabilities. Large print. Hearing devices. Sign language. Wheelchair accessible.

Think of how you are going to get a casket in and out before you design the place. No steps or tight turns.

Other religions are studied and respected. That which is found to be true and helpful is incorporated in the worship experience.

The service isn’t about the minister – it is about focus on God. These mega-churches are personality-driven, not Spirit-driven.

Everybody has to do something. No passive parishioners.

It is essential that nobody thinks they are better than any other denomination. To think that one denomination has a lock on it is to cause division. We are about the “one, holy, catholic, and apostolic church” “Catholic” in this sense means “universal”.

Look around – if there are people from all walks of life and all races, you are doing it right. That is what Heaven looks like.

All are welcome. If there are leaders, then they need to be an equal representation. Not all white, heterosexual men.

Nobody is refused membership because of something they have no control over (gender, race, sexual orientation.)

All members are expected to participate. The same 10 percent don’t do all the work.

Active versus Passive

There was not really a place for me at my old church in Chattanooga. It was big. It was busy. All the roles were filled every week. They had a full complement of acolytes and choir members. There were different lectors every week of the month. There were plenty of chalice bearers. I think I could have skipped going and nobody would have noticed.

In my current church I saw the same two people being chalice bearers for a year. This didn’t seem fair. I asked about how to be a chalice bearer and found it isn’t as simple as just filling in that day like you can in other roles. There is training, and licensing from the Bishop, and proof that you are a confirmed Episcopalian. Then one of the ladies who had served all those months got sick and someone filled in. Turns out there was a whole slew of people who were trained and licensed but weren’t taking a turn at it. Somehow this made me want to help out all the more. I was also a little bit angry at how nobody else was seeing the unfairness of making two people have to serve every Sunday for a year.

I read a book on discerning your calling that said if you notice that somebody should be doing something, then perhaps it means that you are called to do it. The fact that you notice it means it is your job to do. Sometimes I see a lot more than I think I have the ability to fix. But perhaps I’m wrong. Perhaps I see it for a reason. Perhaps talking about what I see will help others see it too.

I’m noticing a decided lack of energy and spirit in church these days. I think that others feel it too. I think this is part of why so many people are leaving church. I think this is part of why so many people never go to start with. They don’t see the point. They see the hypocrisy. They see bigger and bigger buildings that are really good at supporting themselves and really bad at doing what Jesus said to do. The buildings are huge, and are used once a week so that several hundred people listen to one person talk about what they think the scriptures mean. Meanwhile, that money that was spent on that building could have been spent on a homeless shelter. Or a place to counsel people how to manage their money. Or a place to welcome immigrants. Or a place to feed hungry people.

Yes, there is the story of Jesus being anointed with the costly perfume. Right before Jesus went back to Jerusalem in the weeks before he was crucified, his friend Mary took a jar of spikenard and anointed his feet. This stuff was really expensive – about a years’ wages worth. Judas complained – why wasn’t the money spent on the poor rather than on this perfume? And Jesus told him to lay off – that we will always have the poor with us.

I fear that this exception to his otherwise stellar example of service has been taken to be the rule in many churches. So many churches are concerned with their own expenses on upkeep rather than taking care of the commandments. They are concerned about how few people are in church every Sunday – not because they are concerned whether folks are hearing the message of God or not, but whether their tithes will be enough to pay the bills. They are concerned about getting stained glass windows and new fancy vestments. They might get a gold chalice rather than a plain one. Any church that raises itself up is following the wrong master. The stained glass windows are usually bought by members. They raised the money and donated it “to the glory of God and in memory of …….” That $5000 could have fed a lot of people. It could have trained folks how to manage their money. It could have helped folks to be better able to handle life. It makes the church pretty, but it doesn’t make it useful.

Jesus wouldn’t have used a fancy chalice at the Passover meal he shared with his disciples. It would have been plain. They were borrowing somebody else’s room to have this ritual meal in. They were poor and often on the run from the authorities. Jesus also told his disciples to not take any money or an extra cloak with them when they went to tell people the news that the Kingdom of God was among them. So why are churches building up their treasures here?

Church isn’t a social club. It can be that, but it needs to be different that just any other place people gather. It can’t be a place where people gather just to feel good. It needs to be a place where people gather to DO good. Rather than getting the teens together to eat pizza and go bowling, why not get them together to work on a social project? Surely some old person needs their yard cut. Surely a widow needs her house painted. It would be a good opportunity to teach the youth how to be ministers. We are told that every baptized Christian is a minister, but we forget this. We tend to think the term “minister” is reserved for those folks who are ordained. We have become asleep to our own Christ nature. We have become passive, where church is something that is done to us, instead of with each other.

I think it is important for folks to take an active role in church, and see that as a warm-up for the rest of the week. I think part of church is to teach you that you are supposed to be active participants. It isn’t just about showing up. I wonder if this mindset of passivity comes from the idea of having ordained leaders? Part of why the entire Reformation happened is because lay people wanted a more active role in church. So why aren’t we doing it? And why aren’t we seeing our ministry as extending into the world? Why do we forget that we are to “Go forth to love and serve the Lord” as we hear in the dismissal? Go forth. Your work begins now.

Every year people ask me to join the vestry or run the Sunday school or be a part of the altar guild. I refuse every time because I’m already doing three jobs at church. I see no reason why in a church where 150 people regularly show up, only 20 people do all the jobs. I think it is important to leave a space. I think it is important for folks to see themselves in that space.

Having a church membership is like having a gym membership. You have to put something into it to get something out of it. And church isn’t even about you getting something out of it. Yes, you need to be filled. But then you have to go and feed others. Jesus said to Peter – Do you love me? Peter said of course he did. Jesus replied – Feed my sheep. This conversation happened three times. If you love me, feed my sheep. He didn’t say, if you love me, just show up and sing a hymn saying you love me. He didn’t say to build a big church building – he wants the church body. He wants US to use our bodies. He wants us to be him in this world. It isn’t about the building at all.

This body is flabby and weak. We are Christ’s body on this earth. How can we do what he needs us to do if we are so weak? If we are so selfish and needy? If we go to church just to feel content that we have done our duty to God for the week? God wants more than just one hour. He wants everything.